Hey Reader,

Today’s my birthday. I turned 33 and I’m sending this from my hotel room. I opened my favorite beer, an amber one, and I wanted to share some words to mark the moment. A bit about how the day has been and what I’m taking from it.

As you know, I’m guiding a cycling trip. I’ve had the chance these past days to spend time with Dr. Seth Serxner, who is an author, speaker, and advisor on wellbeing. It’s been such a gift to share the day with him, especially since it’s my birthday and, fun coincidence, his wife’s birthday too.

We did the long ride together this afternoon, a good climb, and it didn’t even feel hard because of the conversation. I felt inspired, I picked his brain with questions, and Aurélie also had things she wanted me to ask him. I’ll add his website and book here if you want to see who he is.

One theme we talked about was longevity. I’ve written before about people on these trips who inspire me—like the man who was 82 and still cycling, and now on this trip, a gentleman who is 91.

But what really stayed with me from the conversation with Seth was the reminder that you have to define for yourself what matters. What does it mean to live well? To succeed? To be happy? To be in community?

Aurélie and I spoke last night about what we want for ourselves. The vision we have is of a home of our own, and being part of a conscious community. But we realized we have to define what that really means for us.

For us it looks like this:

• People who are doing okay financially, not necessarily wealthy, but stable and not stressed about basics.
• People with a growth mindset, curious and building things in the world. Often entrepreneurs, but not only.
• People who put family first, because we believe family is the foundation of a healthy community.
• People open to spirit or God, whatever name they use.
• People grounded—not just heads in the clouds.
• People who value community and relationships.
• And people who care about things like regenerative agriculture, seeing deeper ways to heal the planet and ourselves.

That’s what conscious means for us right now.

Another piece we talked about is the “how.” For a long time I believed I needed to earn everything the hard way to deserve it. Even with a home, I felt I should build or renovate it with my own hands to prove myself. But I no longer believe that. I don’t want to put Aurélie and our daughter through years of renovation just so I can say I did it. If our home comes another way, I’m open to that too.

So that’s what I’m reflecting on today: defining what happiness and success mean for myself, not letting others decide for me. Setting my own markers.

It’s my birthday, and it’s been a good one. A ride, good conversations, a beer, and now heading to dinner.

Cheers to you. Let me know what you think.

One dad figuring it out, same as you.
​

P.S. These letters aren’t a broadcast, they’re a conversation. If something speaks to you, or even stirs you the wrong way, just hit reply. I read every message.

See more of my work at rooteddad.com​

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